A good woman does not cheat in her marriage or relationship because of lack of sex or sexual satisfaction. You can be well endowed as a man, blessed with the longest and biggest sexual organ, favoured with the perfect sexual organ, skilled in bed magic’s and still find your woman cheating if you fail to show her affection. Affection is like oxygen to the woman. Once they get affectionate, they are happy.
A woman can stay in a relationship which has no sex on its menu but has affection. In the same way she will leave a relationship where sex is served without affection. When her man refuses to show her affection and the attention she needs, and the only man who gives her that is her secretary, house boy, gate man, driver etc. she might end up giving sex to these men when they request it from her.
Affection is her emotional needs, just as a man has physical needs like sex, when his needs are not meet; he is likely to get it anywhere it served, same with women. Giving women sex instead of affection is like punishment; its like giving a dog bone and pretending the dog likes bone.
Any dog which chases bone is a sick dog which does not know what it wants, because it has not been getting its preference and assumes a bone is what it wants because that is what it is always served with. Who says dogs want bones, if chasing a bone is a dog’s business, then the hunter won’t go to the bush with the dog. For it won’t chase meat but look for bones. What a dog really wants is meat and not bone.
It is the wicked and ungrateful dog owner who reduces the dog’s food to bone after it has chased the meat and truly believes the owner will compensate its effort with meat. Unfortunately the poor dog ends up with bone instead of meat. In other countries, dogs play various roles which humans are not able to do due to the right food and training given to the dogs. If a woman is served with her needs, which includes affection, she can always do wonders in her relationship.
A woman who chases or begs the husband for sex is a sick woman. She can be likened to a sick dog whose food has been reduced to bone instead of meat. Some men are so clueless and they end up raping their wives and assume sex is what the woman want. Stop the rape and bad sex in Marriage. Women want affection and not sex. Don’t just force her to have sex, stop paying deaf ears to “I am not in the mood”, “its painful and not enjoyable”. Stop making excuses for her.
Stop forcing women to fake orgasm and pretend they are enjoying sex with you when you fail to make her feel affection. Lack of affection will cause a woman to cheat on her man and not frequently have sex. Dogs will leave the house where bone is served, to the house where meat is assured. If she is cheating on you despite you adjudging yourself as a super man in bed, check your affection level.
When you fail to listen to her, when you fail to make time and talk to her, when you take her for granted and refuse to spoil her, take her out for shopping, for walks, help her in the house or give her attention, don’t be surprised when you see her in bed with the colleague at work. The man cheating with your wife is not a superman as you think; it also does not mean your woman is a bad person.
What you are missing is that, the man cheating with her sees the tears in her eyes, notices the silence in her voice, and does the very things that she craves for. That man will end up taking advantage of her because she is distant from you but much closer to him due to how he is treating her.
Spouses should learn to listen to each other with their eyes. When you do that, you understand your partner better; you can notice the pain behind their silence. Your spouse gets tired when you ignore them or refuse to listen to them.
They might end up looking for the very thing they need from you, from an outside the relationship. To them, they cannot make you understand a message you are not ready to receive. In conclusion “And look out for one another’s interests, not just for your own” – Philippians 2:4 (GNT). Written by Danjuma Iliya.