There’s a lot of things that I regret about the time that we spent together. I regret all of the times that you made me feel worthless, like no one could ever love me. I regret giving you so much of my love, effort, commitment, and some of the best years of my life, when you gave me so little in return. I regret the way I let you manipulate me, driving a wedge between me and my family and friends and convincing me that I was the problem and that you were perfect.
You were bullying, controlling, and narcissistic. I was naïve, afraid, and desperate for love and affection. When we met, I was happy, optimistic, and full of excitement at what the future could hold. I felt like I could do anything, like the world was my oyster.
When I left you, I was broken, confused, and depressed; being with you wore me down into a shadow of my former self.
But even after all of that, after all I’ve suffered, I still don’t completely regret our relationship. In fact, in a way I’m grateful for it. It might have been one of the worst experiences of my life, but it made me who I am today. The strongest metals have to be forged in the hottest fires, and god knows how much stronger I am now.
Now, I’m on the right path. I know myself, and I’ll never let anyone treat me anything like the way you did ever again. I might have been nearly swallowed up by darkness, but now I’ve been reborn. I pushed my way through all of the conflict, the manipulation, the gaslighting and the putdowns and I’ve come out on the other side a better person; not just happier, but more compassionate, more empathetic, and more loving.
Because you didn’t break me – although you tried your best. You wore me down and bent me out of shape, but you never quite managed to snap me. Now, I’m happier than I’ve ever been, and it’s all because of the lessons I learned from being with you.
So, thank you for the memories. They might not be pretty ones, but they’ve taught me a lot. That’s why I don’t regret being with you – because you showed me how much more I deserve.