Some people are too possessive. When they get into a relationship with you, they want you for themselves and no one else. They give you no breathing space, always wanting to be the center of attraction. Wanting to dictate what you do, where you go. They monitor every move you make, where you go, who you talk to, who you are with, what you are doing. If there is anything called a monitoring spirit then one might be right to conclude they are possessed by that spirit.

When you are with them, you can’t have friends, whatever you do with others is questionable. They want to be where you are, if you have to go anywhere without them, it means losing you. If you have to make calls or talk to someone, it has to be them. Without them, there is no need talking to anyone else. When they call you and the phone line is busy or you are not available, they become angry, jumping into conclusions that you are seeing someone else.

They want everyone to know they are in a relationship with you, even if those people don’t matter. They question why you are not displaying them on your status and DP, why you are not making posts about them, why you are not introducing them to everyone you meet.

Besides being possessive, they are also controlling. They pick up your calls without your consent or permission. They want people around you to know they are in a relationship with you even when the people are not interested in your relationship. They go a step further to set spies around you, hack into your accounts, etc.

These people who do that believe they love their partner so much that they don’t want to lose them that is why they monitor every move they make. To love someone doesn’t mean they have to be who you want them to be. To love someone is to let them be the best they can be.

Love has to be free; you don’t have to be possessive; you have to let it fly. Your partner doesn’t owe you their life because they agreed to be in a relationship with you. They value you and want to share their lives with you. Appreciate that and enjoy every moment they share with you.

You need to create a home for your partner to always come to and not a prison he or she is forced to stay. They need to feel loved for you and not fear. They need to look forward to seeing you or hearing from you not because you suspect them or don’t trust them.

People fond of this behaviour are having issues of insecurity. Its either they don’t love themselves that much, they don’t value themselves that much, and are in the relationship with you for validation.

Some of these people behave like that due to their upbringing, the words said to them, what they have been made to believe about themselves or because they have not gotten over their previous relationship or betrayal, etc. You often hear them making reference to their previous relationship or their Ex. They give you excuses for their present behaviour as a result of how they were treated in the past.

Such a person is sick, he or she needs help and until they work on themselves, they are toxic to any relationship they find themselves in. Don’t get into relationships with them or marry them if they are insecure. Don’t get into relationships with them or marry them if they have issues with trust.

You are not their Ex or their past and they don’t have to treat you like them or compare you to them. You are the present, a gift. If they can’t enjoy this gift but constantly bring in the past then you are better off without them. Each time they compare you to the past, it means they have not fully accepted you and you need to end such a relationship.

In conclusion, “Love does no wrong to a neighbor [it never hurts anyone]. Therefore [unselfish] love is the fulfillment of the Law” – Romans 13:10 (AMP).


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