Recently in a random thought post I made an assertion that “divorce is expensive” and I still maintain that position.
But based on the principle of balance, the need to set the record straight, coupled with recent happenings in marriage, one must hit the nail on the head.
If you are in a toxic relationship or marriage, where you are struggling to be happy, where you are subjected to physical and emotional torture and it’s affecting your emotional and mental well being, it is good to take a decision.
As far as marriage is concerned culturally and religiously in this part of the world you are expected to endure, but we all know there is a “breaking point” common to all irrespectful of gender and the resultant effect of that point is always disastrous and catastrophic. So in order to avoid this one needs to be decisive.
Many people condemning divorce are not in their shoes so it is extremely difficult to know where it pinches. Only the victim as I always say can tell the story.
Is this an outright endorsement of divorce? No! I am an advocate of not only impactful and responsible but also sustained marriage. Yes God hates divorce, He hates violence too.
This is what I have against the church, there is need for balance so people can choose. God want us to live and make the best of our existence, marriage shouldn’t be an hindrance to that.
Before considering a divorce, separate from the violent partner, then make sure you explore every available means (prayer, counseling/therapy etc) to remedy the situation and make it work, and if it’s “not working” then file for divorce.
I must confess to you there are many toxic relationship and marriages. People are going through hell on Earth, be it man or woman. There are many Sepulchre marriages! They appear beautiful outside but ugly inside.
I believe divorce is avoidable only if we can do the needful.
Aside collective responsibilities we have individual responsibilities to make marriage work effectively, but the moment we stop, divorce is inevitable.
A man recently told his wife with all confidence and arrogance that “if they must live together then she must continue to endure his slap and punches” what do you expect the wife to do? Endure till she get herself killed by him or she kill him after reaching her breaking point? And at the end spend the rest of her life in jail.
Recently in the news, a man filed for divorce because according to him “his wife beats him everyday” (March 22, 2022).
I must confess there are horrible marriages with horrible personalities.
Dear singles, even though break up is painful, your sanity and mental well being is sacrosanct. Commitment and submission is limited before marriage so wisdom demands that you do the needful if you find yourself in a toxic or abusive Relationship, do the needful without regret. Refuse to sacrifice your sanity and mental health on the altar of indecision. Forever is too long a time to be unhappy. My one Kobo!
Toxic relationship and Marriage is killing! Stay off it! It is your life first before marriage or relationship.
The covenant of life is superior to the covenant of marriage.
God is helping us but we must take responsibility.
You know I love you.
An impactful and responsible relationship and marriage is possible.