What’s the difference between fake love and true love?
The bible says that we are to love our neighbour as ourselves. In other words we are to treat our neighbour as we would like to be treated. Fake love looks like it practices this principle but in reality in its heart it runs on the principle of ‘you are to treat me as I would treat you.’ Fake love believes you should be sensitive to my needs because I would be sensitive to yours.
This is the opposite of what the Bible teaches, but this is how most Christians play the game. The Bible doesn’t teach that you are to be nice to people so they should be nice to you. It teaches you are to be loving whether they are nice to you or not. Fake love is exposed when it gets annoyed that you aren’t doing it right to ME, when you aren’t keeping ME happy, especially since I would do it right for you.
Fake love does things for its own benefit; it’s generous so you are obligated to it; it’s polite so you are obligated to not be rude to it; it’s nice so you can’t judge it; and it’s sweet so it can manipulate your emotions and confuse your real perceptions.
Fake love keeps people happy so they will have to keep me happy, so you will have to value me and hopefully favour me especially in preference to others. It’s a competition of hierarchical ranking amongst piers and family.
True love is expressed in the bible as agape. It doesn’t do things for its advantage; it does it for the advantage of others.
It doesn’t do things for status; it doesn’t do things to be valued; it doesn’t expect others to treat it as I would treat them; it reacts to situations the way the Lord did. It treats others as I would like to be treated irrespective of how the other is treating me, yet it has the right to defend itself against mistreatment. True love doesn’t get caught up in the issue of my rights, it already knows it has them in God.
Its prime concern is honouring the will of God the Father, even at the expense of offending people. It doesn’t seek to offend but it doesn’t withdraw from offending if what is said or done is from God’s heart.
Fake love blames you for not giving me what I would give you, or blames you for not being sensitive to MY needs. It’s totally selfish and arrogant but presents as nice. Thus fake love believes compassion is when you are sensitive to my needs and requirements and if you’re not then you’re uncompassionate. It judges you for not keeping it happy.
The love of God doesn’t base its behaviour on other people’s behaviour nor does it base its reactions on other people’s behaviour. The love of God is ultimately and primarily interested in what the Lord wants, and not into defending my rights.
Fake love lies about being in love; it’s ultimately only concerned about its own well-being and develops the art of camouflage and adapts to its environment to get what it wants.
