Those dating or in a relationship need to understand that a relationship is between two people and without the other person or your partner, you have no relationship. When your partner tells you, it is over between the two of you, you have no option than to move on. Relationship is not a debit your partner has to redeem even if they promised you marriage. Even if you believe they are making a mistake by leaving you or the relationship, they are entitled to that error, it is their choice, you cannot impose yourself on them or force them to be with you at all cost.

If it’s a lifestyle of theirs which you complained about or advised them on which has triggered the break up, you still need to respect their decision and let them go. It is not in your position to call their friends, family members, colleagues, etc to tell them why the person does not want to be with you. You don’t need to inform the universe why they don’t want to be with you even if you believe you are the best option.

People make such calls to friends and families just to paint themselves good before the people they call and also to paint their partner bad. It does not end there; they somehow hope the people they call can force or convince their partner to change their mind or decision. The question I have for people who do that is, if you are that good and your partner who is close to you couldn’t see or notice it, how sure are you that they will get to know you from other people?

Relationship leading towards marriage is supposed to be between adults who knows what they want. We only advise adults but we don’t force them to do what we think is good for them. We don’t treat an adult like a kid and still want to be in a relationship with them. Such Relationships are not for kids.

Those of you fond of calling everyone you know linked to your partner to report them because they don’t want to be with you should grow up. Such act is childish. It does not speak well of you. If your partner is not willing to share their life with you, no amount of persuasion will make them do that. Embarrassing them because they choose to leave does not make you a good choice to come back to. If you believe you are good enough to be with, be ready enough to let go. Salt does not praise itself.

Sometimes, people who do these kinds of things have the fear of ending up alone should their partner leave. They believe they might not find someone else to be with. What they don’t know is that forcing someone to be in a relationship with you will only make you feel lonelier. The person is not ready to share themselves with you, you give your time, attention, resource but they are still not willing to do same with you. You eventually come to realize you are all alone in the relationship. The pain is worse than being without a relationship.

Another fact that makes it difficult for people to let go their partner or the relationship is that, they focus on the hurt, the memories shared, the promises, their dreams and expectations instead of focusing on the reason why they have to let go. When you focus on the reason, it is easy to let go. You learn from the situation than suffering from it.

Lastly, they put their value on the relationship and on their partner so it makes it difficult to leave. They believe without the relationship; their life is worthless and have nothing to carry on or live for. Everyone going into a relationship should know their value, know their worth and know they are enough. They should understand they only go into a relationship to share what they have.

In conclusion, “If you want to live, give up your foolishness and let understanding guide your steps” – Proverbs 9:6 (CEV).

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