It’s sad how love can easily turn into torture. It’s heart breaking to see the one you once loved, agreed to be with until death do you part, choose to punish you for loving them. Love is not a crime and loving someone against all odds should not make them criminals or be treated as such.

The picture I am trying to paint is that of a couple whose marriage hit the rocks. You are likely to see one doing all he or she can just to save the relationship while the other is also doing everything possible to destroy what is left between them. So, the latter chooses to tear down their partner by purposely doing things that will hurt them. They start by neglecting and ignoring them and provoking them with their words and actions. Some people go to the extent of hurting their partner physically by beating them, poisoning them, etc.

Inflicting pains on someone is not how you teach them to stop loving you. Loving someone is a personal decision and choice, allow them to make such a decision. Your punishment will cause them to hate you. They won’t be able to love again after your departure. Your action may cause them to hate people who didn’t hurt them.

If you are married, we assume you are matured and know what you signed up for. If for any reason you no longer want the relationship or marriage, take the proper steps to end the relationship. Don’t keep the relationship with the motive of hurting your spouse to an extent where they cannot bear it anymore. That is an act of cruelty. It’s inhuman to maltreat someone you once professed to love.

People do that because they don’t want to be blamed for the failure of the relationship and are also afraid of the damages or compensation they will be charged with. Therefore, their best approach is to kill their spouse emotionally or physically. This is a pure act of wickedness and selfishness. You don’t have to kill someone for loving you, you don’t have to destroy someone because they find it hard to let go what you once shared.

Let’s be civil and do the right thing. You cannot enjoy your next relationship by killing your current spouse either physically or emotionally. If you are convinced leaving is the best and only option, that your current relationship is a prison to you and the best way to seek freedom is to leave the marriage, then please be willing to pay for the cost of your freedom.

This behaviour is also common with people dating or in a relationship. Because you promised marriage or lied to someone about marrying them, and in the end you don’t want to do so, you start looking for faults so you can end the relationship. When you are not successful with that, you try to hurt them until they end the relationship themselves. Such an act is violent and the LORD hates it.

To avoid the blame or guilt of a failed relationship or marriage, they put their partner through pain just to feel good or less guilty. Every human being deserves to be loved, that is why the LORD says we should love our enemies. Don’t block your blessings by punishing someone for loving you.

Rather appreciate their love, their time, sacrifice and commitment. Do the right thing by being honest with your feelings, your plans and motive. Use the right approach to end a relationship, but don’t end human lives.

In conclusion ‘Don’t hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody. Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.” – Romans 12:17-19 (MSG).

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