Lots of men tag themselves as traditional men; seeing relationship and marriage as a custom but they confuse custom or tradition with needs in the relationship. How people get married should not take away the needs of the people in the relationship.
They see affection or romance as “western custom” and think once they give their partner money, shelter, vehicle to ease their movement, provide comfort at home, everything is fine. So, some men struggle to understand why their partner is not happy after doing all that.
Providing the physical needs of a woman is a good thing but it does not take away her emotional needs. Just as giving a child the best clothing does not satisfy his hunger for food, men need to understand that giving the woman all the money, house, cars, latest gadgets, does not take away her need for affection.
The emotional need is how you connect with her which requires your presence. Making time to talk with her, sharing bits and pieces of your day and plans and also making time to do with her things that she loves doing.
Talking with her is different from telling her to watch TV or listen to the radio when she is bored. Spending time eating together is different from telling her to get food when she is hungry because you have given her enough money.
Telling her to go to the cinema, beach and hanging out with friends is not the same as going to those places with her. The friends in her life cannot take the space you have to occupy. The relationship she has with friends and the children is not the same as what she has with you.
Her love for friends and her love for you is different. What she does with friends and children are different from what she does with you. You cannot pay for her emotional needs no matter how rich you are. Paying money for someone to massage her is not the same as you massaging her.
Who you are to her determines what she does with you and how she feels towards you. If you treat her as any person in your life, don’t expect her to connect with you as a husband. To women, being husband and wife is not a title but a connection.
When you fail to connect with her, she becomes disconnected from you whenever you want to be intimate with her. It makes no sense for a man to give his woman all the expensive things in the world and not make time to connect with her. You will end up feeling your woman does not appreciate what you do for her.
In conclusion, “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due [its rightful recipients], When it is in your power to do it.” – Proverbs 3:27 (AMP).
