Hurtful Words in Relationship & Marriage leads to Emotional abuse!
Words can hurt! Saying hurtful things is a way of bullying, scaring or putting someone down. So is yelling, screaming or threatening to hurt someone or do something mean to someone or to someone’s possessions. These are ways that a person can abuse someone else and it’s called “Emotional Abuse”.
Emotional Abuse is very bad in a relationship or marriage. And it is very disadvantageous. It create a deep hurt in the heart of the hearer.
Everyday conversation is essential to several aspects of life most especially in maintaining relationships and marriage, building trust and credibility and creating a pleasurable experience for yourself and others.
It comes as no surprise therefore that conversation skills are one of the most basic skills needed to make your relationship and marriage work. One of the most important conversation skills for you to have is the ability to avoid using offensive or hurtful language. This becomes especially difficult when you are not aware that the words you use are actually considered hurtful.
Severally the word of God condemned using our tongues or mouth wrongly. But yet so many believers engage in this unfruitful exercise of using their mouth to bring people down and to hurt them deeply, most especially in relationship and marriage.
This hurtful word ranges from verbal abuses of any kinds and curses.
One can decide to leave a relationship that is filled with hurtful words and walk away to be happy. What happens in marriage? The receiving partner becomes hurt daily and it is not easy to walk away! It will only continually spoil the marriage more. So bad! The hurtful words you say in ten minutes could last in the heart of the hearer 10 years after!
I can’t imagine a man who rise up to curse his wife daily over little disagreements. Sit up at night to speak terrible hurtful words to his wife’s hearing. What advantage will this bring to him from his wife? Will it better a marriage or make it worse? Will it produce a positive effect in the wife? Likewise from a woman to her man. Oh No! It will rather saden her/his heart and make your relationship worse and go more sore. A man/woman that indulge in this lacks wisdom!
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.Prov 15:1
Your Christianity is vain if you can’t control your mouth from hurtful words!
If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man’s religion is vain. James:1:26
Saying your wife/husband is stupid means you are more than stupid. Saying your partner is senseless means you are the most miserable person for marrying her or him. Most of this words are pointed back at you directly because you are one.
You tell your wife you regreted marrying her and you always abuse her family members and curse them? This is the height of foolishness! You have to receive wisdom and stop!
Some will even call their wives terrible names like slot! Your own very wife? But you are one. You are joined to a slot and you are the father of all slots? Can you imagine your stupidity? You have to leave the level of foolishness today! Do you know what the Bible says about that?
What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.
1 Cor 6:16
And when you say all these hurtful things to her you still expect good sex? A woman is an emotional being more than a man. When you always speak hurtful words to your wife, it kills her sexual prowess. It kills her enthusiasm though she forgives you. You wonder why your wife at some times stays like a dead wood? This is caused by the freshness of your hurtful words in her heart.
You need good support from your woman? Hurtful words won’t give you, but rather is will take her heart far away from you! It will make her only think on how she can develop thick skin to your abuse and forge on in life without you. In all your gettings, get wisdom and understanding.
Don’t you know that the word of God says: Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: Prov 24:3
Understand your spouse! Receive wisdom! The weaknesses from your spouse must not generate hurtful words to him or her. But rather correct in love and pray for him or her for a change you desire. Instead of waking up at night to curse him or her why not spend the night praying?
How many times have you gone out on a journey of peace? Just that!
Correcting in love! Have you ever meditated on ‘correcting in love?’ What does correcting in love means to you? Think deeply of when you have been in fullness of love, then make corrections in that mood! And see if it won’t produce results.
When a method is not working, a wise person stops and try another. All the noises, yellings, curses, anger display during corrections please sir how many results has it brought to your marriage? Madam has it changed your hubby? Try the God given counsel. CORRECT IN LOVE!
Emotional abuse is the beginning of physical abuse. Some goes from it to start beating their spouses! It is very unfair to do this. Be wise! Make a change!
Briddle your tongue! Think before you talk. Don’t talk before you think like some foolish persons. Some foolish persons will talk very offensive things and curse their partners and after will say they do not mean it. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it.
The secret is: “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers” Eph 4:29
Do you know?
“The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.” Prov 15:4
