Few days ago, a woman asked a question in one of the groups I belong to.
She asked, “How do you deal with male toasters as a married woman?”
I found the question very interesting. So I went into comment section to read what people, especially women, had to say.
I always advise that, when issues are being discussed, look out for people’s comments for that will reveal their disposition towards the issue at hand.
As a man or woman thinks in his heart, so is the person.
I spent some time reading comments and I was amazed at what some people have to say about the issue.
30% of the women said that they don’t know how to handle it.
20% of the women offered sensible solutions based on how they have been handling the matter themselves.
50% of the women said that they should ask the men for money and the men will disappear or stop toasting them.
Some where making fun of the matter.
One woman in particular said that, she loves chatting with her toasters, the sensible ones.
I was wondering what she meant by the “sensible ones” and what she could be chatting with these “sensible ones.”
This is how cheating starts, unknowingly.
May be you’re a married woman and you want to stay faithful to your husband but you’re finding it difficult to deal and handle toasters, this article is for you.
In this article, I will be showing you ways to handle them.
But before I go on to show you how to handle toasters as a married woman, I want you to take note of these points…
✅ That you are married will not make other men to dissappear.
You will still see men around you.
You will see men that are more handsome, romantic, caring, richer than your husband.
You will also see men that your husband is better than.
The point is that, men will not disappear because you are married.
It cannot happen.
✅ That you are married will not stop men from toasting you.
Especially if you’re beautiful and naturally endowed, men will toast you.
They will see your wedding ring but they won’t mind, they will still come for you.
They will still be angeling, babying, sugaring, sweethearting, and angling you.
They don’t mind you divorcing your husband to marry them.
But just like one of the women said in the post, “Men have the right to ask you out and as a woman you have the right to say YES or NO.”
In other words, you cannot stop a bird from flying over your head but you can stop it from building a nest on your head.
So, because you are married will not stop men from asking you out and toasting you but it is your responsibility to make it known to them that you are married.
✅ It is largely your responsibility to remain faithful to your partner
Your husband will not follow you around but as you commute around your business for the day, men will be throwing advances to you.
It can come from a colleague in the office, business partner, or random men.
Sometimes, these temptations can be very tempting and alluring.
However it comes, it is absolutely your responsibility to remain faithful to your husband.
You can cheat on your husband without him knowing, but it takes a woman that fears God, a woman that loves and respects her man to remain faithful to him, no matter how many men are chasing after her.
It takes a woman that respects her marital vows and the institution of marriage to stand by her man.
What I am saying in essence is that FAITHFULNESS IS A CHOICE!
Sometime ago, a lady called my attention to a conversation she had with a guy that was trying to toast her.
This lady is married, just few months into marriage. Her profile picture shows she and her husband.
The guy saw all that. She even told the guy that she is married but the guy told her that, he does not care.
It was this statement that made her to call my attention to the chats.
I became angry in my spirit and I told her that she is not supposed to be engaging this kind of people in conservation.
The fact that the guy did not respect that you’re married is enough reason to block him.
Well, she did.
Some married women are in this kind of situation. Men are coming after you even though you are married. I wrote this article for you. To help you to manage the situation.
Part 2
- Wear your wedding ring
I’m aware that there are some women that doesn’t wear jewelry because of religious or personal reasons, however wearing your ring does some good.
We still have reasonable men. When a reasonable man wants to approach you as a lady and sights your ring, he will back off because you are married.
Few weeks back, a uniform man was abusing a lady, calling her all sorts of names but on sighting her ring, he retracted and began to apologize to her.
Wear your ring, ma. It’s an announcement to the world that you belongs to someone.
- Present yourself well
The well you present yourself determines how people will treat you. Some of you married women acts as if you are still single.
Stop being too playful. Stop shinning your teeth to every DICK, TOM AND HARRY. Stop being too accommodating. Stop being too free.
Always remember that the way you take a guy is not the same way he will take you.
You may have nothing in mind but the way you are free, play, shine teeth, and accommodate etc., may make him begin to think that you like him and he will begin to talk nonsense.
Know your limits.
Start acting like a married woman. Talk as one. Dress as one. Behave like one.
- Cut off communication
Lack of communication is the easiest way to end any relationship. If you don’t want disturbance from men cut off communication.
Stop giving out your numbers. Stop responding to chats of your toasters if you don’t want to have anything to do with them. Stop picking calls from those men disturbing you and you will have your peace.
Block those men disturbing you for relationship or sex.
But some of you women still want to eat your cake and have it. You enjoy attention from men. You like the way they come after you. It makes you feel like you are still hot and sexy.
Let me tell you, you’re trading on your dangerous ground. When a guy will sweep you off your feet, you won’t know.
Cut off communication!
- Be firm
Some men don’t take no for an answer. So if you’re not firm you will not win them. Some of you are shining teeth and playing with someone that’s toasting you, you’re not serious.
You’re giving the guy more motivation and encouragement to persist in his pursuit. If I’m the one, I will not loose hope easily. I will still believe I stand some chances.
Be firm. Be decisive. If your answer is “No”, them mean it. Stop romancing it. Let your no be no. Stop saying “No” with your mouth and “Yes” with your actions.
You said “No” to his request but when he calls you will pick, when he chats you up, you will respond. You guys will play, gist and laugh. You are not serious, ma.
- Dress well
Dresse appropriately. Stop competing with single ladies that are probably looking for husbands on who shows more of the cleavage, laps and the shape of the bodies. Your nakedness is meant for your husband only.
Dressing provocatively may cause some men with lack of self control to come after you. Prevention is better than cure.
She that fetched ant infected woods, has unconsciously invited the lizards for a party.
Stop dressing like a single lady. You are a married woman, dress like one. I’m not asking you to start tying wrapper up and down. Dress responsibly, that is all saying.
Men asking you out is not the problem. The way you handle it may be the problem.
Men have right to ask you out and you have the right to say YES or NO.
Everything lies with you.
Be on guard.
Let me conclude by asking men to steer of married women. When a woman tells you that she’s married, let her be. Don’t be a reason why someone’s marriage crash. YOU WILL NEVER GO FREE IN LIFE!
