One of the qualities people look for in others when they are considering relationships is understanding. When they meet people who make time to listen to them and take their inputs, feedback, and suggestions into consideration, they feel loved and valued and end up in a relationship with them.
But things change when a couple starts having conflicts in their relationship. That is the time they want their partner or spouse to understand them more, but unfortunately, that is the time they hardly understand each other. Soon, the couple start growing apart, they cannot have a simple conversation without ending up arguing or fighting.
How good is a relationship if you can not understand each other if you can not have a simple conversation without fighting or arguing? For most people, that is when they opt for a breakup.
The question is, is it difficult to understand your partner? The answer is no. You get to understand your partner when you are patient and make enough time to listen to understand each other’s perspectives and feelings, rather than trying to project your opinions, thoughts, and feelings on your partner.
Don’t just listen to your partner; be willing to find out how they feel and give them the needed support when they get emotional. Don’t make them feel bad for being emotional. We all get angry sometimes when we feel mistreated, but that does not mean we have an anger issue. We all get sad when we are hurt, but that does not mean we are playing the victim or being dramatic.
To understand your partner means to put yourself in their shoes. That is how you show your love and care. That is how you make your partner feel like he/she belongs, is valued, and is respected. Women feel loved when they are also heard. Men feel respected when they are listened to.
The truth is, we all want to be loved, but we find it hard to love; we all want to be respected, but we find it hard to respect; we all want to be understood, but we find it hard to understand. If you want to be in a relationship, then be willing to love, respect, and understand your partner.
In conclusion, “Be a friend to yourself; do all you can to be wise. Try hard to understand, and you will be rewarded.” Proverbs 19:8 (ERV)